expectancy | expectation


      Sarayu says to Mack:

I am more attuned to verbs than nouns. Verbs such as confessing, repenting, living, loving, responding, growing, reaping, changing, sowing, running, dancing, singing and on and on. Humans, on the other hand, have a knack for taking a verb that is alive and full of grace and turning it into a dead noun...

Mack, if you and I are friends there is an expectancy that exists within our relationship. When we see each other or are apart, there is an expectancy of being together, of laughing and talking. That expectancy has no concrete definition; it is alive and dynamic and everything that emerges from our being together is a unique gift shared by no one else. But what happens if I change that expectancy to an expectation - spoken or unspoken?... You are now expected to perform in a way that meets that expectation... Our living friendship deteriorates into a dead thing with rules and requirements.  It is no longer about you and me, but about what friends are supposed to do...

      But Mack argued:

If you didnt have expectations and responsibilites, wouldn't everything just fall apart?

      [and in response]

Responsibilities and expectations are the basis of guilt and shame and judgement, and they provide the essential framework that promotes performance as the basis for identity and value... The idea behind expectations requires that someone does not know the future or outcome and is trying to control behavior to get the required result. Humans try to control behavior largely through expectations... Because I have no expectations, you never disappoint me...

William Young, The Shack (2007)


"Expectations are premeditated resentments"